Yesterday I posted a tweet that said, “Ladies, dressing provocatively not only discounts how you’re viewed, but it also attracts a lesser type of man. Modesty is hot. I promise.” Now, while a majority of the response was positive, there were a number of people who took offense to my message—even to the point of reckless accusations and my being called offensive names. Why? Apparently the tweet was viewed as archaic and even offensive to the feminism of some women—and men. And as much as I’d like to defend myself against the naysayers, I feel the stance I’ve taken through my writing is sufficient enough to prove where I stand on the subject of women and their independence.

While reading through the replies to my tweet, there seemed to be a special type of venom behind the words of some of the women. They appeared to be offended that I was suggesting they should only dress a certain way, and doing otherwise would result in their freedom as women becoming forfeited. To me, they were implying that modesty goes against their hard earned feminism. Yet, why do feminism and modesty have to be on opposite ends of the spectrum? Why are they unable to co-exist?

It’s no secret that men—for the most part—are attracted to copious amounts of skin being flashed by the opposite sex. It’s carnal and animalistic, but it’s just the way we are; we’re conquerors. Yet, to my knowledge, a Godly man isn’t necessarily going to chase after a woman who is provocatively dressed; we’re going to pursue the one who is dressed to match her virtues and beliefs. We want a good girl, just as they want a good guy. However, a woman is free to dress anyway she wants. Not only is it a legitimate right, but it’s also a non-verbal way of describing herself as a woman and a person. But is it anti-feminist to dress in a way that attracts the type of man you would like to have in your life? Absolutely not. It’s a choice every woman has.

Feminism is the pursuit of independence for women from the stereotypes and cookie cutter ways of yesteryear. It’s about freedom and the availability of choices that should be accepted by all. Feminism is about equality. So if a man can choose to dress the way he wants to attract the type of woman he wants, why can’t a woman?

Women should be able to do whatever they set their mind to, and in that vein of belief, there’s a place for the coexistence of feminism and modesty. Like everything, it’s a balance. But it’s a balance that’s possible simply because it’s an option a woman has.

Modesty and feminism aren’t enemies; they’re comrades.

It’s time we began to treat them that way.

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My debut novel “These Were the Nights” will be available everywhere this spring.